Participant Observation

Field Notes Tuesday, July 16, 2002

This is the second day of Writing Project and my assignment is to write about how I think things are going so far. Yesterday, I noticed some expressionless faces… but I expected that… looked up to note the expressions. I remember from my first WP experience (last summer) that it took some time for me to get acclimated, three days to be exact. (Tomorrow is the third day and I’m curious to see what will unfold.) From the first day I had a good feeling about this group. Everyone shared and several honestly admitted feelings of inadequacy regarding their writing abilities. Betty Gail was particularly forthright and I think this was a relief and encouragement for everyone. At lunch, Marlene expressed her belief that the rest of us are so creative… and she is not. Doug reminded her that several of us have been through this before and are, perhaps, a bit more comfortable. I agreed adding that because we have experienced Writing Project, we know we don’t have to worry about our writing and that frees us up. I want to remember to tell her that we share her attitude in appreciating the writing of others, including hers. I did tell her that by the end of the institute… she will have changed her mind about not being creative. I am impressed with Vicki, who is very creative and seems to associate everything (songs, commercials,) with teaching. She seems to naturally incline toward the multi-genre approach that Amy demonstrated.

I think I have noticed some resistance and I wonder at the cause. Is it unfamiliarity? I don’t know what I am basing my observations on besides facial expressions. Some people share much more than others. I am quick to share, partly because I enjoy it, and partly because I am uncomfortable with silence. After Charles’ presentation today there were several who did not share and I wondered why. Was it the difficult subject matter? Feelings of inadequacy regarding what had been written? Difference of opinion? Charles talked about “falseness” in the classroom, a falseness stemming from inequality of power… the graded and the grader. We are being graded. Is there a fear that certain attitudes toward subjects will be judged with greater esteem? Does this interfere with willingness to share? Still… I believe our sharing was valuable interaction, providing food for thought… even if I’m not privileged to know those thoughts.

A guiding question which Karen asked us to consider for this project is: How do teachers come to understand social action in their teaching practice? I’m thinking about what social action might mean. The term brings to mind issues like the environmental destruction of the planet and the need to stop this. Then I think about how many jars and plastic containers I have thrown out over the last month instead of recycling them. I think of the homeless, none of whom have been offered a bed at my house. I am often anti-social and sedentary and can feel stirrings of resistance to the concept “social action”. Will there be a lot of guilt involved in this venture? But Charles also talked today of his “personal life and [his] teaching life being one and the same” and that because of this he feels he has “achieved an integrity in life.” Is this social action?